Just discovered my vegan neighbour starved to death in his flat.
Couldn't find a pulse.
A vegan girl at work was giving me earache yesterday for swatting a mosquito. Apparently, me stopping myself being bitten was 'barbaric'. She suggested that I try to 'be like the mosquito', so that I might better connect with the lesser creatures of the planet and in doing so become happier as a person.
So today I walked up to her, stabbed her in the leg, inserted a straw and attached it to a dyson. She was right you know, I do feel much happier than I did yesterday!